Sunday, June 28, 2015

No Child, No Job: How does it feel to be a writer without a child at 30


"Get a real job!"

I already lost count on how many times grandma "suggested" what I should be doing in my life.

After kindly letting me know what to do, she usually expresses her opinion about people in welfare, so passionately that I can really tell that it is "not meant for me."

"I hate it when people who are healthy and fit to work choose to stay home and do nothing!"

"Thank you, Grandma. You may blame Obama again before you go to bed at six."

When you finally think that all these nice things are over, here comes my mom with an obsession of having a grandkid ASAP!

"When are you going to have a baby? You're getting old. Look at Cherry (my best friend), she's going to give birth on December. Look at May, she already have three kids. Look at..." And so on and so forth, until she enumerated all the names of my friends who are so blessed to have cute little angels.

How do I feel? Honestly?

OMG! I feel awesome. Finally, I'm 30 - doing what I really love - waking up every morning saying, "Thank you, Lord! I love my life."

I am a writer. I am writing for a living. Loving words as they love me. My first children's picture book, "Grandpa Bill and His 1000 Dogs", will be on the market soon and I have a lot of writing projects I can't wait to finish.

Of course, I still care what people who matter to me say about my choices. But I am not that silly kid anymore, who stabbed her classmate in the ear using her pencil because her "friends" said so.

I can confidently say that writing is what I want to do for the rest of my life. It's the same confidence I have when I said, "No" to having a child yet.

I adore children. I like them so much, but I simply don't want to have a kid yet. Maybe three to five years from now, I would feel that desire to have one but today, on my birthday, I just don't want to wish to be a mother yet. Instead, I wish that women do not need to be told or to explain their choices whether it's about their career, their gender preference in relationship and above all, about their very own uterus.

We will say, "No" when want to. We will say, "Yes" when we mean it. So, just stop!

Stop living someone else life and start celebrating your own. 

Happy Birthday to me!Party!Party!

About the Author


Iris Pickler is the writer of the children's picture book, "Grandpa Bill and His 1000 Dogs." 

To learn more about her, please visit her blog and follow her on Facebook and Twitter.